Let's talk about something screwed up

Once again, a journalism class is increasing my consciousness of some seriously screwed up business.

I'm writing this feature on ghostwriting in the medical community, and focusing on the oft-sleazy and always profit driven pharmaceutical marketing behind hormone replacement therapy, which is supposed to help women going through menopause. Okay, I've never gone through menopause, and I've heard it's tremendously unpleasant, but check out some of these actual real things Wyeth (the maker of Prempro and Premarin, two major HRT drugs) said and published to sell their products:

-"Menopause isn't gone in a flash-- its debilitating consequences can affect the rest of your life." (This seems a bold thing to say about a natural biological process. Pathologizing the female experience a bit, are we? Biology is destiny!)

-"Almost any tranquilizer might calm her down...but at her age, estrogen may be what she really needs," "aside from keeping a woman sexually attractive and potent, estrogen preserves the strength of her bones, the gow of her skin, the gloss of her hair...Estrogen makes women adaptable, even-tempered, and generally easy to live with." (I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING ABOUT THIS! These two date back to the '70s, but aside from a slight increase in political correctness, this is still the basic marketing shtick Wyeth is using today: convince women that once they hit a natural phase of their life, they're hysterical bleating bitches and need to purchase and consume drugs to mediate the crazy and remain functioning members of society. Fair.)

-Lexicon: "cure" for the "tragedy of menopause"; using "menopause" and "middle-aged depression" synonymously

-[spokesperson:]"My number 1 secret is estrogen. It's good for your moods, it's good for your skin. If I had to choose between all my creams and makeup for feeling and looking good, I'd take estrogen." (This was from 2000, people).

And of course, the most damning marketing move they made was telling women and physicians repeatedly for years that HRT is good for way more than just menopause. Take it to reduce your risk of osteoporosis! Take it to avoid heart disease or colon cancer! Take it to prevent vision problems and tooth loss! Take it for Alzheimer's! The FDA approved none of this and soon the National Institute of Health began a study into whether or not any of it was legit.

And so, not only was all of that bullshit, but, WAIT FOR IT, HRT was also proven to increase the risk of a slew of medical conditions: blood clot risk increased by 200%, strokes by 41%, breast cancer by 26%, and so on.

This is what we get when we characterize as medically abnormal something that is human and naturally occurring, like menopause. It creates the irresistible opportunity to make a market for products that "allow" women to meet some arbitrary standard of normalcy and functionality (constructed and enforced by people who will never endure menopause.) WTF.

MTA,
I thought we might be lovers.
I liked the cool blue of the L train, the drone of the man who tells me not to block the doors and to report unwanted sexual conduct (is wanted sexual conduct on the train really any better?)
But now I've realized, this is an abusive relationship. You smack me around. You reroute me to places I don't want to go. You arbitrarily take trains away, just to remind me that you can. Everything is a power play with you, MTA.
You trap me in a crowded fluorescent box under the East River for twenty, thirty minutes at a time. (That's straight up some David Blaine shit, MTA.) You make me ride a jerky shuttle bus from Lorimer St to Morgan Ave when I have to go to work on the weekends.
And the worst part, MTA, isn't how you treat me. It's how you know as well as I do that I have no choice. I'm an enabler. I will stay with you. I will keep giving you money so you can pay the bills.
And when I'm stuck between First Ave and Bedford, I will have no idea where I am or when I'll get moving again, and I will realize I am powerless to control you. You are going to make your trains go wherever and whenever you want them to, and I will ride them and feel paralyzed and helpless, and if you keep me there long enough, I will throw myself, prostrate, at your giant steel feet and beg you to please, please take me where I want to go.
And you will smile, knowing that once again your dominance in this relationship has been reaffirmed, and take me there. You cruel tease.

My friends made a movie

I was the art department

Sunday in the Park with John

Dear Raven Symone,

facebook message from my little sister:

i was cleaning out my desk and i found this letter that i wrote to raven symone 5 years ago but never sent:
Dear Raven,
i think you'rea really great role model for girls my age. Plus you are a great actress. Plus you're good at singing too. You're so pretty and seem like the kind of person that would be really nice and funny.
I really like That's So Raven. It's one of my favorite shows on Disney Channel. It's also really funny. I thought that the Cheetah girls was really good. Your roll in Princess Diaries 2 was funny.
I'm Bri. I'm in 5th grade. I love gymnastics and tennis. I like to sing along with my favorite songs and making up dance routines. I love spending time with my friends and laughing. Right now me and my friends are watching Napolen Dynamite. It is such a funny movie. Have you ever seen it? If you haven't you should. So kep being a great role model!!

Four Television Shows That I Will Watch In Spite of Watermarks and Japanese SubTitles

I don't own a television.
Not in a pretentious, "I'm so subversive and counter culture that I reject your capitalist television" way, but in a "my roommate and I are full time college students, so even if I could kill four hours moving from 'True Life: I Huff Paint' to 'True Life: I Have No Hands,' I'd feel bad about it" kind of way.
So, no, no television. But in spite of my lack of television, sometimes I want to watch television. It's an easily solved conundrum, however, thanks to the fantastic array of shitty websites from which one can, with no legal qualms, stream TV shows that someone else posts in blatant copyright violation. Most of these people seem to be Japanese, and so I have on more than one occasion accidentally clicked a "Take me to some other stupid advertisement site" button that I thought was a "pause" button due to my inability to understand the language. Also, there are usually subtitles, big enormous cryptic white subtitles.
Let's save the obvious conversation about cultural imperialism for another day. Here are 4 television shows I am willing to watch online despite the fact that the experience is pretty sub-par as compared to watching something on, you know, an actual TV.

1. WEEDS This is my favorite TV show. The plot just keeps getting weirder and darker and sicker, you see Mary Louise Parker's tits in season 4, and while the political commentary is sometimes a little heavy handed (Andy's long diatribes on the Iraq war and immigration are the writer's poorly veiled opinion-dumps), it's still pretty well written. Also, not naming any names, but someone gets their face SANDED OFF. Also, it's about pot.



2. BATTLESTAR GALACTICA Listen, I'll spare you the long rambling speech I have given each of my friends at least twice about how this show is like, totally not science fiction! It's about mortality, man! What does it even mean to be human? If you aren't already watching this show, there's really no excuse. It's a work of art, and I do not say that about many things that appear on the SciFi channel. I can never decide who is hotter, Starbuck or Number Six, and it's hilarious when Lee Adama gets fat. The suicide bombing plot device is brilliant, also. The people writing this show are talking about real life cultural wars! Just watch it already!

3. LIFE AFTER PEOPLE Did you ever wonder what life would be like after people? Just, you know, after people? This show is here to inform. It turns out all that environmentalist crap is BS, and people are actually doing a lot of shit to keep the world together! Like, if people just disappeared, apparently suspension bridges would eventually snap and fall apart! Humanity is great! Let's hope it never mysteriously and suddenly disappears.



4. DARIA If I have any sardonic cynicism, this show is to be credited for it. I watched it every day after school (yes, in 1997 I was in grade school, I am a tiny infant child, I know). Rewatching it now it is equally hilarious although sometimes the stereotypes feel a little dated: okay, yes, cheerleaders and football players are dumb. But the jabs at school administration bureaucracy (watch the first episode on "Self-Esteem Class") feel strangely relevant these days (Lawndale High and NYU might have more in common than one would think). And I'll always be a sucker for a show with a smart, badass female protagonist. If I ever have daughters, I will make them watch this show. And they will say, "Mom, that is so lame! Why are you making us watch this 'screen' thing when we can just watch stuff on the feed that goes directly into our brain?"

great development of humankind #2942

The Internet is seriously just another way for people to hate one another.