Not in a pretentious, "I'm so subversive and counter culture that I reject your capitalist television" way, but in a "my roommate and I are full time college students, so even if I could kill four hours moving from 'True Life: I Huff Paint' to 'True Life: I Have No Hands,' I'd feel bad about it" kind of way.
So, no, no television. But in spite of my lack of television, sometimes I want to watch television. It's an easily solved conundrum, however, thanks to the fantastic array of shitty websites from which one can, with no legal qualms, stream TV shows that someone else posts in blatant copyright violation. Most of these people seem to be Japanese, and so I have on more than one occasion accidentally clicked a "Take me to some other stupid advertisement site" button that I thought was a "pause" button due to my inability to understand the language. Also, there are usually subtitles, big enormous cryptic white subtitles.
Let's save the obvious conversation about cultural imperialism for another day. Here are 4 television shows I am willing to watch online despite the fact that the experience is pretty sub-par as compared to watching something on, you know, an actual TV.
1. WEEDS This is my favorite TV show. The plot just keeps getting weirder and darker and sicker, you see Mary Louise Parker's tits in season 4, and while the political commentary is sometimes a little heavy handed (Andy's long diatribes on the Iraq war and immigration are the writer's poorly veiled opinion-dumps), it's still pretty well written. Also, not naming any names, but someone gets their face SANDED OFF. Also, it's about pot.
2. BATTLESTAR GALACTICA Listen, I'll spare you the long rambling speech I have given each of my friends at least twice about how this show is like, totally not science fiction! It's about mortality, man! What does it even mean to be human? If you aren't already watching this show, there's really no excuse. It's a work of art, and I do not say that about many things that appear on the SciFi channel. I can never decide who is hotter, Starbuck or Number Six, and it's hilarious when Lee Adama gets fat. The suicide bombing plot device is brilliant, also. The people writing this show are talking about real life cultural wars! Just watch it already!
3. LIFE AFTER PEOPLE Did you ever wonder what life would be like after people? Just, you know, after people? This show is here to inform. It turns out all that environmentalist crap is BS, and people are actually doing a lot of shit to keep the world together! Like, if people just disappeared, apparently suspension bridges would eventually snap and fall apart! Humanity is great! Let's hope it never mysteriously and suddenly disappears.
4. DARIA If I have any sardonic cynicism, this show is to be credited for it. I watched it every day after school (yes, in 1997 I was in grade school, I am a tiny infant child, I know). Rewatching it now it is equally hilarious although sometimes the stereotypes feel a little dated: okay, yes, cheerleaders and football players are dumb. But the jabs at school administration bureaucracy (watch the first episode on "Self-Esteem Class") feel strangely relevant these days (Lawndale High and NYU might have more in common than one would think). And I'll always be a sucker for a show with a smart, badass female protagonist. If I ever have daughters, I will make them watch this show. And they will say, "Mom, that is so lame! Why are you making us watch this 'screen' thing when we can just watch stuff on the feed that goes directly into our brain?"
0 comments:
Post a Comment